I struggle with my feelings of self worth. This has been an especially bad year for me with this struggle. My weight, living last spring and summer with my Mom who told me a number of times that I should be ashamed of myself, for being an introvert, for needing time to myself, for getting grumpy when I was sick, and now her being east and her games with my sister and putting me in the middle, and her game with offering money to everyone, but making me pay. Its all so wearing. I know first world problems. I don’t want to be sitting here, fat and on the verge of tears, having nightmares of my ex husband all night and not making it to work on time, and not being prepared, showering in a room instead of a tub, and not having clothes to wear and not being prepared.
I ask on social media, what am I doing right? What am I doing wrong? The first step, they tell me is in asking the question, in self reflection.
They tell me I have a good soul, that I am a beautiful person, that I am strong and giving. And I think of who I am.
I need to start examining these things, and I want to use this blog to do it. Will you join me on this journey?
What is your self worth? What is it about yourself that you love?